CORKY CARTURN: THE DREADED BOLSA BUG

"Feared as well as reputable some-more than jellyfish or hulk man-eating clams, these beachbombers continually scare gullible gremmies as well as tourists. Once, after donating about the quart of red red red blood to one, whilst still in pain, you gazed north toward Jack in the Box as well as you could see an armed forces of these B-52s drifting behind as well as onward from the wetlands.

"The funniest partial for locals was examination the 'inlanders' get bit. Once, these 3 Asian dudes in bunhuggers were laid out upon the prohibited summer day. Within minutes, you speckled the hulk gnarly Bolsa Bug land in between the shoulder blades of the city slicker in the middle.

"In about 8 seconds, this city slicker screamed out in Japanese as well as all 3 proposed fluttering their beach towels – all you accepted was 'Godzilla.'

"If bitten, the usually well known remedy is the taquito salsa from Tastee-Freez."

"Your Buddy,

Duke, Seal Beach"

At the time you got this, you wasn't genuine certain what he was articulate about as well as you hadn't seen the essay in the Outdoors territory of the paper.

So you e-mailed him behind asking him what he was articulate about as well as additionally if it was OK for me to make make use of of his e-mail in the column. you similar to the approach he tells the story as well as didn't wish to disaster it up by putting it in to my own words. you usually got this the single behind from him.

"Hey Corky,

"Dude, the Bolsa Bug is those large gnarly black equine flies which continually unit Bolsa seeking for the horde red red red blood donor. I'm certain the couple of of the groms in your roller stay perplexing to locate the couple of ZZZ's after the event have been victimized.

"These dudes demeanour similar to unchanging equine flies upon steroids. Some days, they have been thicker than pigeons, chicks as well as kids hatred them!

"I've been bitten so most times, I'm right away impervious, as well as you theory I'm so aged they cite young, uninformed hemoglobin. These dudes have been unequivocally intelligent, too; I've usually seen the single killed in 50 years.

"This city slicker was fibbing out with his wetsuit pulled down around his waist as well as the Bolsa Bug landed upon his back. His friend yelled out, 'Bolsa Bomber, don't move.' He grabbed the half-eaten bag of Doritos, disfigured the finish as well as whack, crushed the bomber in mid-transfusion.

"The Register had the design (rendering) as well as an essay about the "tabanus punctifer" in the Edge of Nature series.

"Check out this paragraph: 'The males' eyes have been enormous, jacket around to encounter during the behind of the head, giving these creatures the Cyclopean look.'

"It's the females which scare Bolsa, drifting red red red blood banks. (Reminds me of my initial wife.)

"Yeah, Dude, you can make make use of of any of my things if it's worthy, you was during Barnes & Noble during Marina Pacifica the alternative day you do investigate upon wasting time as well as was in the roller territory as well as picked up something similar to 'The Encyclopedia of Surfing.' There is the design of you in there when you're about sixteen – you gotta check it out!

"Later, Duke"

Oh, yeah. Now which you know what he was articulate about, you will behind which up all the way.

It used to be even worse years ago prior to they put in Bolsa Chica State Park as well as parking lots as well as bathrooms with prohibited showers as well as stuff. When it was still Tin Can Beach, clouds of those suckers – as well as suckers is the undiluted tenure of them, as well – used to dim the sky.

I recollect the single day, you suspicion there was an obscure starting upon or somethin'. It got all dark, as well as afterwards all of the sudden, you could listen to this low droning sound.

Everybody sat wordless upon their play in the lineup perplexing to figure out what it was. Then all of the sudden, you were pounded by squadrons of those things dive-bombing us similar to ships in Pearl Harbor.

Holy Humanity. It was Tora Tora Tora Tuesday. you was exceedingly shop-worn as well as the offensive mental recall of which day still lives upon in the dim reaches of my black memories. Eeeeeee.

Anyway, interjection to Duke, you know which you am starting to have nightmares.

Corky Carroll is the three-time general surfing champion. Send ideas, suggestions, donations or bold comments to him by e-mail during corkysurf@aol.com.

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